DEVIL goes into a seizure-like ruckus. The MOM
returns to LITTLE BOY's side. PSYCHIATRIST goes back toward
DEVIL.
NURSE JANE Doctor, come quickly
PSYCHIATRIST
(To Devil)
So, how are we doing?
The DEVIL calms down and just stares.
PSYCHIATRIST Why won't he answer?
Nurse JANE Doctor, this man says he's the devil.
PSYCHIATRIST The Devil. . .Well, I can’t
think of a better “Specialist” to cure him of
that notion, can you?
They look at each other with raised eyebrows.
NURSE JANE He refuses to take his medication, sir.
PSYCHIATRIST And why is that? Don't you want to get well?
DEVIL Your treatments are useless, Doctor.
PSYCHIATRIST I see....
DEVIL I don’t think you do. You can’t heal the Devil with an IV-drip and a handful of
downers.
PSYCHIATRIST You know, epilepsy’s a
frightening disease. Some would say
it
is hell.
They even used to think it was caused by demonic possession. Perhaps your
condition--
DEVIL I am not of this world and neit
her is my condition. I’m rotting on the inside. I
need a fresh soul. An innocent soul. A pure soul. My kingdom demands that I have
it. How am I going to find the soul I need in here, Doctor?
THE PSYCHIATRIST sends NURSE JANE out and looks at LITTLE BOY
PSYCHIATRIST You’ve been here before. It’s here. Children understand hell. They
have no real sense of time. They never know if something good will ever be over, or
if something bad might ever end. They're alwa
ys in a sort of hell.. Most adults can't
remember what it's like.
DEVIL That’s true.
PSYCHIATRIST I’ll tell you what. I'll help yo
u find that soul. A perfect, innocent soul.
One that must be given to you willingly, Am I right?
DEVIL That's right, I can't steal it.
PSYCHIATRIST Then let’s play a game. Like a child’s board game. The object of the
game is to get your soul. If you win, I let you go home. If you lose, you remain here,
my patient ...forever. What do you say? Is it a deal?
DEVIL Making a deal with the Devil. Do you really think that's a good idea?
PSYCHIATRIST I can take care of myself. Even the Devil has his demons.
At this point THE SIX (Minister, Clown, Friendly, Jane, Professor, Petra) become
THE SIX DEMONS, each putting on a black coat with a crow attached and black
tophat and coming to the PSYCHIATRIST's side. The DEVIL reacts with fear.
PSYCHIATRIST Even the Devil has his demons...
NURSE JANE What do you recommend, Doctor?
THE SIX pull out bottles of PILLS in rapid succession
CLOWN Prozak
FRIENDLY Barium
PROFESSOR Lithium
MINISTER Morladone?
PETRA Shock therapy?
(A long pause while they think about it, then rapidly...)
CLOWN/MINISTER/JANE benzadone
PROF/PETRA/FRIENDLY Triamiline
PSYCHIATRIST No. No more drugs.
(to the DEVIL)
There's a man
here who needs some curing. Who’s in need of a psychiatrist. A real
psychiatrist a genuine head shrinker!.
FRIENDLY Yes.
NURSE JANE A brilliant Psychiatrist!
CLOWN A genius
MINISTER Pure Genius
PROFESSOR Fantastic
PETRA Indeed.
The sing a tense, softshoe
THE SIX DEMONS
He's the head of psychiatry
He loves his patients quietly
He treats them well
And hopes like hell
in hopes that he can cure them
Cure themselves, Cure themselves
If not they’ll all
They’ll all end up in...
ALL
(SUNG)
HELLLLLLLLLLL!!!
(last music)
END OF SCENE